Saturday, December 31, 2005

Thank you.

Although this blog began January 1, 2005, I was writing to myself for the first six months, as I had no idea about how to visit other blogs, leave comments, or get traffic. Duh on me - LOL So I would like to thank everyone who eventually came to visit, and especially those of you kind enough to leave comments. (These are in random order, not "most favored" or "most comments" or "most likely to get me noticed" LOL) Non-bloggers Kel = friend without a blog Robbie = friend without a blog Steph= friend without a blog MA = friend without a blog Sandy= EverAfter Weddings (not a blog - she does weddings - LOL)
Hot Coffee = 7h075 Stacey = Stac Space
Cpt Pyro = Life as I know it
GrandPooOfAwesome = It’s All Relative? Wil = The Daily Snooze
Complimenting Commenter = Complimenting Commenter
Shylah = Simply Shylah
Jim = Genuine
Stephanie = The Daily Vegetable
Bry-2000 = Purple Toupee
Scott = Swept Over
Lesser Lumpkin = Lumpy’s Oddyssey
KristieD = Just Venting
Village Idiot = Kicked Puppies
Bebe = Serenity NOW
Catherine = Just Me Rambling
Darren = Problogger
Soffy O = The Weather
SillyBahrainiGirl = Silly Bahraini Girl
Hart = Pet Lvr
Mellon Collie = Yacketayakking
Sudie Girl = Musings of a Chick
Dilated = Nu Tang
Clive = Gone Away
Veggie Babe = HP Sauce
Blog Patrol = The Blog Patrol
David B. = The Whole Note
Peter Chianca = The At Large Blog
Stuart = My Kids' Dad
Rhys = Rhysently
Orikinla Osinachi = Nigerian Times
Cube = The BLOG
Pure Mood = Just Pure Mood
OldOldLady Of The Hills = Here in the Hills
Monkey = The Monkey Cage
David = Ripples
J’s Girlfriend = Sometimes in my Head
Lee Pletzers =Author Lee Pletzers
Vanathi = Y Not?
Jean-Luc Picard = Captain Picard’s Journal
All U Need 2 No = All U Need 2 No
Deborah = Deborah Woehr
Ms. Cornelius = A Shrewdness of Apes
Carly = STFU Carly
Stargazer = Stargazer's Space
Ribbiticus = Pond Perspective
-------------------------------------- I got kind of loopy going through all of the comments trying to catch everyone’s name and link - Hope I didn’t miss anyone! -------------------------------------- I recently took at shot at Blog Explosion’s "Rent My Blog," and would like to thank my sponsors: Ribbiticus at Pond Perspective Kel at Mama? MAMA COME HERE! Amy at Amy’s Musings ------------------------------------- The picture of Father Time in my banner courtesy of Novareinna - visit for fun facts about New Years! ------------------------------------- The people down in town who set up an inflatable snow globe with a snowman inside. It was placed on uneven ground, and the blower that is supposed to circulate the "snow" inside, spews the little bits out right beside the snowman’s head. It gives the snowman the appearance of barfing, and we laugh hysterically every time we drove by! LOL! ------------------------------------ Blogger for adding word verification. Sometimes it’s a pain, but it stopped most of the spammers (hisses vehemently at all things spam - LOL) Plus sometimes I get a real chuckle out of the "almost-a-word" combinations, which oddly often fit the nature of the post. I left a comment at a post regarding the commercialization of Christmas, and the word verification was, "bahmbg" LOL! ----------------------------------- I would like to thank everyone who has linked to me, or recommended my blog, or mentioned me anywhere, anytime, ever. LOL -----------------------------------
Best Wishes to EVERYONE for a glorious New Year!

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Christmas 2005 Part Three

Thus our family was blessed with the best gift in the world. Love. A new person to hug, to laugh with, to help plot world domination - LOL She is beautiful, charming, intelligent, funny and caring. Her gift request from my son was a donation to Doctors Without Borders. When I had adequately repaired my makeup, (God Bless the inventor of waterproof mascara LOL) we sallied forth to our last stop, my husband's parents'. They’re a hoot and a half in their own right. Still spry and hilarious in their 80’s, they greeted us with smiles and a crackling fire (in the fireplace, unlike a friend found years ago, when a mentally unbalanced relative set her bathroom on fire trying to sneak a cigarette. Nothing says Christmas like a blazing toilet - LOL!) Eldest Son and Steady Girlfriend/Now Fiancée arrived about an hour after us, adequate time for us to open gifts and squirm with worry that one of our youngens would spill the beans - LOL Grandma had just suggested a game of bingo when they arrived, which was postponed for more greeting/gift opening. Eldest Son gave his grandmother......a bingo set. It was fate I tells ya, fate - LOL So bingo we played, with all "in-the-know" wondering when the proclamation would come, glancing surreptitiously at the engagement ring. The game can get ruthless when you’re playing for a grand prize of Russell Stover Chocolates. Luckily, no one was stabbed (not this year LOL) Eldest Son lost repeatedly, and I commented, "Lucky in love, unlucky at bingo," which earned me a tight-lipped, evil glance. I smiled sweetly. We ate, then retired to the living room, filled with good cheer and ham. Small talk and increasingly less-subtle staring at the left hand of Steady Girlfriend/Now Fiancée ensued until The Big Announcement came. I cried again. Duh. Hugs all ‘round. More tear-wiping, good wishes and LOTS of questions later, (sorry darlin’, we’re a nosey bunch LOL) everyone is smiling, happy and content. Wedding date is not scheduled, estimated for next fall. Adequate time for liposuction and face peel, I think - LOL So much of life is attitude. I have suffered much, yet I smile at each new morning. My New Year’s Wish to all of you is for peace, joy and happiness. I leave you with these words of wisdom: There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved. George Sand Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face. Victor Hugo (1802 - 1885) The mind is its own place, and in itself, can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven. John Milton While we are focusing on fear, worry, or hate, it is not possible for us to be experiencing happiness, enthusiasm or love. Bo Bennett, Year to Success If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane. Jimmy Buffett Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word happy would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness. It is far better to take things as they come along with patience and equanimity. Carl Jung In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer. Albert Camus Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy. Anne Frank People are just as happy as they make up their minds to be. Abraham Lincoln To have joy one must share it. Happiness was born a twin. Lord Byron A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who makes opportunities of his difficulties. Harry Truman This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24 When written in Chinese the word "crisis" is composed of two characters - one represents danger and the other represents opportunity. John F. Kennedy, address, April 12, 1959 Those who wish to sing, always find a song. Swedish proverb True happiness comes from the joy of deeds well done, the zest of creating things new. Antoine de Saint-Exupery An inexhaustible good nature is one of the most precious gifts of heaven, spreading itself like oil over the troubled sea of thought, and keeping the mind smooth and equable in the roughest weather. Washington Irving You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses. Ziggy No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars, or sailed to an uncharted land, or opened a new doorway for the human spirit. Helen Keller Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence. Aristotle Remember, happiness doesn't depend upon who you are or what you have, it depends solely upon what you think. Dale Carnegie She would rather light candles than curse the darkness and her glow has warmed the world. Adlai Stevenson, Eulogy of Eleanor Roosevelt, November 7, 1962 (I want this one as MY eulogy - LOL)

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Christmas 2005 Part Two

We managed to surprise and delight each family member, a miracle right up there with Jesus’ birth. (Thunder rumbles in the distance...OK, I get it, back off of the comparisons to the Lord - Sorry - LOL) There IS instant karma in seeing gifts make their recipients happy though, and Husband puts his arm around me, and we share a knowing smile as we watch their shining faces light up. Then it is off to visit. Over the river and through the sprawling subdivisions, to Eldest Son’s house we go. He shares an abode with a cast of characters worthy of the wildest sit-com writer’s imagination. Males, females, feline and canine all happily reside in the split-level funhouse. They have decorated extensively, and filled one another’s stockings with kindergarten toys. There is something magical about seeing a tattooed, eyebrow-pierced young man sitting cross-legged on the floor, giggling over a coloring book. Eldest Son learned deviousness and trickery at his mother’s knee, and we end up giving one another presents we had questioned about as possible gifts for others. "Do you think Dad would like...?" I had asked weeks earlier, and reading his expression of, "Yeah, heck, I’d like that," it did indeed become his gift. He had directed me to a website and asked if the items would be suitable for his younger brother and sister. My eager response earned Husband and I those gifts - LOL Eldest Son gave Steady Girlfriend a baseball jersey emblazoned with "Sweatheart" and she in turn gave him a gift engraved with "I love you, sweatheart". They explained having chuckled mightily over a book of photographs of misspelled graffiti, and how they'd laughed that some urban Lothario had emblazoned a bridge with, "I love you, sweatheart". They had picked it up as their own private endearment. A while back, Eldest Son had taken Steady Girlfriend to New York City, to see her favorite band, U2, in concert. They spent a week there, and it rained six of the seven days. He brought his laptop out to exhibit photographs they had taken. The two of them started describing the scenarios of each picture, laughing together, sharing a secret smile, and my throat began to clutch up. I’m such a sap anyway, I cry at sad movies, happy events, and baby food commercials - LOL Throw in the sentimentality of Christmas, and I am a fountain. But there was something so. . .dare I say, "precious" about their reminiscences. The way they giggled at being drenched at every turn, the joy they took in one another’s company, that made the inclement weather irrelevant. They had delighted in seeing things...not only for the first time, but also as a shared experience. They had taken the elevator to the top of the Empire State Building, and walked out on the deck, even though the rain and fog had made visibility near zero. They had felt the wind sway the building. Then our son, our firstborn, had truly rocked the world, and gotten down on one knee and proposed. The small crowd of dampened tourists cheered when she accepted his ring, and his mother cried like a baby when they told us the tale. Steady Girlfriend/Now Fiancée held out her delicate hand to display the engagement ring. It was lovely, she is lovely, and I am a salt lick, so drenched in happy tears. To be continued.........

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Christmas 2005 Part One

Ah, Christmas has passed. Like a kidney stone. Just kidding, it was great. We were blessed to have all three of our children, plus my husband’s parents together on Christmas Day. The day began at home. When your “baby” is 16, it is not longer the youngens tugging on the covers at 5 AM to awaken their parents, but rather two weary but smiling adults, sipping coffee and glancing periodically towards the rooms of their slumbering progeny. Husband questions, “Should we wake them up?” I say I have an idea. He looks at me questioningly. He knows me too well. I reassure him it does not involve ice cubes or chainsaws. LOL I bake crescent rolls.

You have to understand this family’s love of crescent rolls. A platter of crescent rolls can vanish quicker than St. Nick up the chimney. Don’t blink, or you will be roll-less. The timer goes off, and I scurry into the kitchen. I pull the baking sheet out, and hand Husband an oven mitt and hot roll. “Take this into Daughter’s room and wave it under her nose,” I suggest. I do the same with Middle Son. Nostrils flare, eyes pop open. Rolls are tantalizingly withdrawn to doorways. Nothing says Christmas like baiting your children with pastry. LOL They join us and we deliver the goods. Biscuit bits and sleep sand mingle as they rub their eyes. To be continued.........

Saturday, December 24, 2005

Merry Christmas Bloggers!

Best wishes to all of my fellow bloggers for a Merry Christmas!
May peace and love fill your hearts and souls, May we not be spammed by comment trolls.
May our posts be witty, our thoughts delight, May words we type, some thought ignite.
May truth and hope we all embrace, Blogs make the world a better place!

Wednesday, December 21, 2005


Dear Santa, I understand that one of my colleagues has petitioned you for changes in her contract, specifically asking for anatomical and career changes. In addition, it is my understanding that disparaging remarks were made about me, my ability to please, and some of my fashion choices. I would like to take this opportunity to inform you of some issues concerning Ms. Barbie, and some of my own needs and desires. First of all, I along with several other colleagues feel Barbie DOES NOT deserve preferential treatment - the bitch has EVERYTHING! Myself, Joe, Stacey, Skipper, and Raggedy Ann & Andy, DO NOT have a dream house, Corvette, evening gowns, and in some cases, the ability to change our hairstyle. I personally have 3 outfits which I am forced to mix and match at great length. My decision to accessorize my outfits with an earring was my decision and reflects my lifestyle choice. I, too, would like a change in my career. Have you considered :"Decorator Ken", "Beauty Salon Ken", or "Out of Work Actor Ken"? In addition, there are several other avenues which could be considered such as: "S&M Ken," "Bear Ken", or "Master Ken". These would more accurately reflect my desires and perhaps open new markets. And as for Barbie needing bendable arms so she can "push me away", I need bendable knees so I can kick that bitch to the curb. Bendable knees would also be helpful for me in other situations-we've talked about this issue before. In closing, I would like to point out that any further concessions to the blond bimbo from hell will result in action taken by myself and others. PS. Barbie can forget about having G I Joe - he's mine, at least that is what he said last night. Sincerely, Ken ********************** Good grief! Two posts in one day from me - LOL!


Not long ago Santa was getting ready for his annual trip. . .but there were problems every where. . . four of the elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones so Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule. . .then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her mum was coming to visit. . . This stressed Santa even more. . .when he went to harness the reindeer he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out heaven knows where. . .more stress. And then, when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards on the sleigh cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered all the toys. . . Frustrated Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whiskey. . .but he found that the elves had hit the liquor cupboard and there was nothing there to drink. . .and in his frustration he dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. . . he went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from. Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed on his way to the door. . .he opened the door and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree. The angel said: Santa, where would you like to put this Christmas tree?? And that, my friends, is how the little angel came to be on top of the Christmas tree. . .

Sunday, December 18, 2005

The Week Before Christmas

‘Twas the week before Christmas, and all through the place, There was garland to hang, dust bunnies to chase. The greetings were stamped, addressed with great care, In hopes that the mail carrier soon would be there; The children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of vid-yo games danced in their heads; I am in my sweatsuit, with presents to wrap, Tape’s stuck to my fingers, I wish I could nap. When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the couch to see what’s the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash. The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below, When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a cat who’s in heat, and four suitors, sincere. With a hiss and a squall, she darted away, Leaving all of the boy cats, to start a big fray. More rapid than eagles the male cats, they came, And I whistled, and shouted, and called them by name; "Now Furball! Now Havoc! Now Shadow and Koes! Y’all better scatter, or I’ll get the hose!" "To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall! Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!" As dry leaves before the wild hurricane fly, When met with an obstacle, mount to the sky; So up to the house-top the felines they climbed, With hearts full of lust, my intrusion ill-timed. And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof, The howling and scratching, occasional woof. As I drew in my head, and was turning around, I smiled, ‘cause in springtime, kittens will abound. They’ll be dressed all in fur, darting, dashing about, They’ll knock over dishes, I’ll try not to shout. A bundle of joy they will bring to our house And we’ll never worry ‘bout having a mouse. But work! Oh my, there is still so much to do! I’m beginning to wonder if I will get through. I still need more ribbon, this gift has no bow, But the roads are all slick, from the slush and the snow. Regardless of weather, Christmas will arrive So I will go brave it, with my front-wheel drive. I’ll slip and I’ll slide as I go down the street, Still so many tasks I have yet to complete. There’s cooking and cleaning and shopping to do, And I’m sure to break something, so don’t forget glue. I’ll spring to my sleigh, I’ll drive like a missile, And away I will fly like the down of a thistle. But you’ll heard me exclaim, as I skid out of sight, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."

Thursday, December 15, 2005


Please read this all the way through. Trust me - LOL A friend sent it to a group of us. I was in a hurry, and afraid it was going to be depressing, so I didn’t, until I read the responses of the other recipients, and realized what I’d missed. *******************************
Late last week, I was rushing around trying to get some last minute shopping done. I was stressed out and not thinking very fondly of the Christmas season right then. It was dark, cold, and wet in the parking lot as I was loading my car up with gifts that I felt obligated to buy. I noticed that I was missing a receipt that I might need later. So mumbling under my breath, I retraced my steps to the mall entrance. As I was searching the wet pavement for the lost receipt, I heard a quiet sobbing. The crying was coming from a poorly dressed boy of about 12 years old. He was short and thin. He had no coat. He was just wearing a ragged flannel shirt to protect him from the cold night's chill. Oddly enough, he was holding a hundred-dollar bill in his hand. Thinking that he had gotten lost from his parents, I asked him what was wrong. He told me his sad story. He said that he came from a large family. He had three brothers and four sisters. His father had died when he was nine years old. His mother was poorly educated and worked two full time jobs. She made very little to support her large family. Nevertheless, she had managed to skimp and save two hundred dollars to buy her children Christmas presents. The young boy had been dropped off, by his mother, on the way to her second job. He was to use the money to buy presents for all his siblings and save just enough to take the bus home. He had not even entered the mall, when an older boy grabbed one of the hundred dollar bills and disappeared into the night. "Why didn't you scream for help?" I asked. The boy said, "I did." "And nobody came to help you?" I wondered aloud. The boy stared at the sidewalk and sadly shook his head. "How loud did you scream?" I inquired. The soft-spoken boy looked up and meekly whispered, "Help me!" I realized that absolutely no one could have heard that poor boy cry for help. So I grabbed his other hundred and ran to my car.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Slittin’ on the Dock of E-Bay

I make a little money selling stuff at E-Bay, and most of the time it’s a lot of fun. Christmas can get a WEE bit crazy though, and I am about ready to slit my wrists. Just kidding. I do not want to speak unkindly of the buyers, because they are sweet people who send me money - LOL E-Bay itself, as a company, could make things just a little bit easier, though. Yo, Meg! (Margaret C. Whitman, CEO of Ebay Inc.) Have you ever tried to list anything yourself? Here, have a Prozac and we’ll run through it together. Let’s list this Christmas ornament. No, Meg, we’re not going to worry about political correctness and call it a Holiday Ornament. It’s a Santa Clause for Christ’s sake. No I’m not cursing at you; Christmas IS for Christ’s sake. Let’s have a shot of whiskey. OK, here’s the home page. What’s with this "it" thing? {{Meg shrugs}} Now we’ll go to "Sell". Oh, I see somebody else complained, ‘cause you’ve got a new version of the Sell Your Item Form. 'Bout friggin’ time, Meg. Allrighty. . .what's this? Take a survey? I don’t think so hon, we’ve got to move these refrigerators, gotta sell these color TV’s. Don’t look at me like that Meg, it’s a joke. I know we’re selling an ornament. Don’t you remember the rock video for "Money for Nothing" by Dire Straits? {{I imitate Dire Straits, playing air guitar while singing, "Money for nothin' and your chicks for free"}} {{Meg reaches for the whiskey bottle.}} So, it says enter a word to describe your item. I’ll type in Christmas Ornament. Geez Meg, twenty categories? What if I don’t KNOW what year it was made? I got it at a garage sale for cryin’ out loud. Here’s one that says Santa; we’ll go with that. Add a picture...sure. Edit picture. Let’s see - ACK! Santa looks like a Ku Klux Klan member! Crimeny, Meg, that brightness setting is intense, huh? That’s not good. Undo, undo. Enter description. Now we’re gettin’ somewhere. I wrote it all up in Word, we’ll just paste it in. HEY! WTF, Meg? I had it all set up with different font sizes and colors, so it’d look festive. Now everything is the same size and color. I’m gonna have to use that gawd-awful interface to change it to the way I want. Here, we’ll click on change font color and go warm up a cinnamon roll, maybe it’ll be done by the time we get back. (Several minutes later) Oh look Meg! It finally changed it to what I told it to do in the first place. You’ve got crumbs on your blouse. Don’t blame me. Yes I’m sure it was expensive. Yes, real silk feels wonderful. I usually wear sweats, don’t rub it in. Let’s just get on with it, and set the price and shipping. Now we’ll preview it. Ah oh. It’s mangled, Meg. The description is all over the place. Some of it is centered, some isn’t. Put the bottle down and look. Why is it showing a gift icon? I didn’t click that...hey that costs an extra quarter! {{Removes gift icon, frowns severely at Meg, who is looking away while softly whistling a tune that sounds like, "I can’t imagine how that extra charge thingy got there, and damn you for noticing".)) I sigh. We’re almost done. What’s that? No, I don’t want to pay $20 to make it a featured item. It’s selling for a dollar, Meg. A dollar. We’re going to submit it now. Let’s do this Meg; let’s push the button together, and then we’ll have another drink. {{A mushroom cloud rises somewhere in the world, as Meg and I raise our glasses.}}

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas

I think snow is beautiful, even though I know it’s out to get me - LOL

The flakes started falling at dawn yesterday. We now have a foot! School let out early yesterday, and is closed today. McDonald’s never closes though, so I will be braving the elements to delivery Fry Boy to his appointed station.

Click on picture to enlarge. Use back button to return.

The BBQ and a lawn chair on our front porch Wish me well...............

* * * * * * *
UPDATE: Traveled at top speed of 28 mph. One hour, three slides-going-around-corners, two attempts to make it up driveway, and countless frayed nerves, I made it!

Monday, December 05, 2005


Barbie c/o Mattel, Inc. El Segundo, CA 90245 Santa Claus North Pole, North Pole Dear Santa: Listen you ugly little troll, I've been helping you out for decades, playing at being the perfect Christmas Present, wearing skimpy bathing suits in frigid weather, getting my hair ripped out by little brothers, and I hate to break it to ya Santa, but IT'S DEFINITELY PAYBACK TIME! There had better be some changes around here this Christmas, or I'm gonna call for a nationwide meltdown (and trust me, you won't wanna be around to smell it). So, here's my holiday wish list: 1. A nice, comfy pair of sweat pants and a soft oversized sweatshirt. I'm sick of looking like a hooker. How much smaller are these bathing suits gonna get? Do you have any idea what it feels like to have nylon and velcro crawling up your butt? 2. Real underwear that can be pulled on and off. Preferably white. What bonehead at Mattel decided to cheap out and MOLD imitation underwear to my skin?!? It looks like cellulite! 3. A REAL man...maybe GI Joe. Hell, I'd take Tickle-Me Elmo over that wimped-out excuse for a boytoy Ken. And what's with his little molded bits anyway? If I'm gonna have to suffer with him, at least make him (and me) anatomically correct. 4. Breast reduction surgery. I don't care whose arm you have to twist, get it done. 5. A jogbra. To wear until I get the surgery. 6. A new career. Pet doctor and schoolteacher just don't cut it. How about a systems analyst? Or better yet, a public relations senior account exec! 7. A new persona. Maybe "PMS Barbie", complete with a miniature container of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and a bag of chips; or "Animal Rights Barbie", with my very own paint gun, outfitted with a fake fur coat, bottle of spray on blood and handcuffs. 8. No more McDonald's endorsements. The grease is wrecking my vinyl. 9. Mattel stock options. It's been more than 40 years - I think I deserve it. 10. Ditch the little plastic heels. I want a pair of Manolo’s, big boy. Ok, Santa, that's it. Considering my valuable contribution to society, I don't think these requests are out of line. If you disagree, then you can find yourself a new bitch for next Christmas. It's that simple. Yours truly, Barbie

Saturday, December 03, 2005

Deck the Halls!

Pullin' out the Christmas decorations here...don't trip on any of the extension cords - LOL! Are any of you doing special blog decorating for the holidays? When does it reach the point of overkill? (Please don't tell me I'm there - LOL!) Is the page loading slowly? I was concerned about using the big pictures. . . (So much to worry about, so little time - LOL)

Thursday, December 01, 2005

World AIDS Day

My best friend Al, died of AIDS nearly two decades ago.

He was the first gay man I knew well. He was a good friend of my husband, and introduced us. (Knowing if we were both crazy enough to enjoy his company we would get along with one another - LOL) He had a wicked sense of humor and could always make me laugh. He taught me things about pleasuring a man that I would never have thought of - LOL When I was an unwed mother, he accompanied me to an elegant soirée held by the radiologists of the hospital I was shaming by continuing to work in their x-ray department, despite being knocked up and not married. Having premarital sex is not an adequate reason for dismissal, so they had to put up with me. I told Al of the upcoming event, to be held at an exclusive club. I said since my future husband/father of my child had to work, that I wouldn’t be attending. I was informed in no uncertain terms that I would be attending, with him (Al) as my “date” because he’d always wanted to see the inside of the place. I kept pretty quiet about my private life, (hard to believe, huh? LOL) so my co-workers knew little, but were intensely curious. Showing up pregnant with a flaming gay man provided enough gossip fuel to heat the building for a year - LOL We arrived in a VW Beetle, which was valet parked. We entered the chic Palace of Plentitude, me carrying the out-of-wedlock child who would be born in a couple of weeks, and Al in all his Gay Glory. He wore more makeup than I did, including black eyeliner; a large back cape lined with blood red satin, and a pair of loafers spray painted gold. We were quite the pair. We ate, laughed, danced the tango (YES - what a sight!) and had a blast. He knew when he was dying, but didn’t fear the reaper, saying he’d rather live fast and die young than to be a lonely elderly homosexual. “There’s nothing sadder than an old queen,” he used to say. He was wrong. There was me, the day he died. I hope you’re cloud-dancing in those gold-leaf loafers, Al. I miss you.